Alright. It is the beginning of 2025.
How
did
your year last year work? How well
did 2024
work out for you? Was it kinda good? Was it kinda bad? Was it alright? Was it great?
We're gonna
talk about why reviewing your year is important
and talk about how do we take our goals
and
start working so that they we can actually
learn from the lessons of last year
and apply them to
2025?
This is The Relaxed Mail,
a show that comes to you each week, helping men men to remove the nice guy from their life
so they can actually live their life on their terms.
Join the host certified coach, Brian Goodwin, as he helps men step out of their heads and become free from the thoughts that bind them.
Amen. Hello, and welcome to Relax Mail. I am your host, Brian. And thank you so much for coming back and listening yet again. This is episode number 256,
and we are at the beginning
of 2025.
And I I know. I'm I'm making this so that it's now won't be evergreen. I could I won't be able to replay this intro,
at any other time. I won't be able to reuse it on 2026
because it'll be talk about 2025.
So it's it's fine.
But I wanted to take the time at the beginning of this year
and do something that a lot of us men
don't
do that often.
And that's actually sitting back and reviewing
your year. Reviewing what did you do? How did where where are you at in your
overall
goals,
views,
up you know,
things along those lines?
Where where were you where are you at
now as opposed to when you where you were at at the beginning of 2024?
And the reason why I wanna do this is because, well, you're going to
you're going to make progress no matter what it is you do.
And the more progress that you make
and the more progress that you
are
are able to
acknowledge that you've made,
it's gonna be putting a little bit of gas into that tank
and allowing you
to get closer to your goal just by the fact that alright. I you believe in yourself. You're giving yourself some credit that, hey. We're doing something
right
here.
And so this is why we want one of the reasons why we wanna review.
Like, for for relaxed mail, this app this,
this show, I put out
100
hosts
for 2024.
I also put out 10 extra 10 new pages.
Some of those pages are still up. Some of those pages got taken down. I have tried stuff.
I have tried bringing people in. I've tried saying, hey. We're gonna be doing it this doing this this year,
and
I've got a lot of lot of losses
this year.
I've gotten enough losses that there's been a couple discussions between me and the wife
on whether I need to keep pushing on relaxed male or not. And
so far, I still have to say, yeah. I'm pushing on this.
I'm not
where I want to be yet.
And that's because I'm there's things I've gotta learn to do. Now there are things that I'm going to be doing this coming year
that are not quite relaxed male centric,
except for the fact that they are going to still
have relaxed mail mixed in there with it.
I
still am working at trying to get out of the truck so that while
so that as I get out of the truck, I can actually
put more effort into relaxed mail and into this coaching practice and and help
more men
get out of their own way.
And this is why a lot of my
goals this year,
1, I'm going to continue posting
at least 2 in 2 posts of,
a, a week, which is there's one gonna be for,
for
the blog post, and there's gonna be one post for the podcast.
And then there might be an extra one somewhere along the way depending on
what the event is. Like, 20 in in November is, International Men's Day. I think it's 19th
from thinking about it. I don't know if I had the information right up in front of me, but there'll be a special blog post out for International Men's Day. I just it's something I normally like to do. I didn't do it this last year, though, which is kinda interesting that I didn't. But at the same time, it's
it's, something that needs to be something that I like to be able to to voice.
Now I
I will still continue to refine
the message that I am putting out
that men are
masculine, noble masculine
by nature,
and that
we don't have to be the victims to
what society thinks men should be.
As a matter of fact, I think we ought to fight against
what society thinks men should be because
society is being ran by women
right now.
And guys and simps, and sadly, simps ruin everything.
We are
I am working to make sure that men
stand up
and find
the high value
traditional woman
who wants to go on
a great adventure called life together. And to be able to do that,
I have to work on that messaging even more.
It's still not there. I'm not attracting
as many guys
as I think there would be
interested in this. Because I hear I still see guys in in divorce groups who are
who are crying about the fact that their wife left them.
Why they leave them? Well,
if you really look at it
because there's actions that they have done. They have allowed their their mind, body, soul, and community pillar to crumble to the point that they're no longer attractive to their wife.
So we're working on those on those four pillars of a raw ex man. We're going to be building those up and we're going to be showing these men, hey,
if you want
to have happiness in your life,
you've gotta be building your your knowledge up. You've gotta be continuing to learn. You don't have to be mister bookworm where that's all you're doing is nose in a book because now you still also have to take care of yourself. You have to be able you wanna be building up a a skill
while also
building up your community.
And that skill may even influence your soul.
Find your passion.
And when you have all 4 of those
those pillars
interlink,
then you've got a very stable platform for your spouse to be able to be the woman she wants to be. You're not going to be the overly anxious,
mealy mouthed, mister nice guy.
You're gonna have your thoughts. You're gonna share your thoughts and your wife's going to take those thoughts and do with them what she wants.
And you're okay with that.
You're not going to try to force her to like what you're doing.
You're not going to try to force her or her relationship into something better. You're going to allow her to have her relationship
and her her
experiences
and her emotions,
and you're just gonna be at the man who stands beside her as she humans.
The same as she's gonna stand beside you as you are a human. So what did you do this last year? What did you do good?
What needs to be improved?
Why does it need to be improved?
And why
did your wins
win?
Why why were you successful
in those wins? What did you do differently than the one than the times that you would lost?
These are things you want to write down. These are the things you want to look at. These are the things you need to understand
in reviewing your life, in in reviewing your year.
What did you do right? What did you do bad? What did you learn from the encounter?
And what can you do to make it better next time?
What
is needed
for that year? And that's the whole reason why we review our year. We wanna review our year for the very reason of knowing where we stand
and how do we get to that next level
ahead of us.
Because when you can write those down and you can know that those things work, those aren't necessarily gonna be what allows you to get to the next level after this.
But you know, 1,
what's in you
to be able to get things done. What can you do to be able to get
further down the road?
So you want to review. You want to be able to
look in the past
and look behind you,
but you don't want to obsess
about what's behind you. Reviewing your year doesn't mean that you drive in the rear view mirror.
It's just something that allows you
to have a point of reference.
So after you have gone through and you were reviewed,
you've decided that this is what's good, this is what's bad, this is where I need to improve,
then you get to go off and it's time to start focusing.
And that's where
things get interesting because we a lot of us men, we just kinda like, well, I'm gonna lose £10. No. We're going to lose £50
by the 31st December.
We're gonna use those SMART goals. We're gonna take those SMART goals. We break them down
into smaller attainable goals. Right now, with the way I've got my I wanna lose £50. So that means I have to lose
almost 1 pound a week.
Is that gonna happen? No. There's gonna be times that I'm gonna gain a few pounds. There's gonna be times that I lose a few pounds,
and it's possible.
I can lose
£50,
but I have to make sure that I have a game plan.
So you have to have a game plan too.
We all do.
And that game plan for me for losing £50
is 1, I'm going to be walking at least 15 minutes a day,
at the very minimum,
more than likely closer to an hour a day.
I am going to be eating
clean food or cleaner food at least,
which means
Pizza Hut pizza,
Taco Bell,
A lot of
the the fast food
is going to be out of my life for this year.
Cokes.
That's going to be the tough one because the big booger bear that I need to battle is actually going to be sugar.
Can I kick sugar out of my life?
50 years old now. So I know I've got plenty of plaque in my in my arteries
that's just
one.
I'm
getting there to getting to where I'm just one sugar crystal away from
clogging everything up.
And then what happens?
Now we're gonna have all sorts of problems then. I gotta get to walking so that I keep the circulation of my legs going because
I drive 10 hours a day,
which means that
I'm a really good, candidate for deep vein thrombosis,
And I don't care to throw a clot and have a pulmonary embolism.
That would be very much bad because I want to live to be a 100 years old.
It's a good round number. I also wanna be make sure that I'm here for you. I'm not just here for my wife. I'm here for you guys too. And that's what I wanna be able to do. I wanna be able to help y'all become the better men that society needs you to be. And I can't do that if I am
weak in all 4 of my of my pillars.
I'm still learning.
I've found my passion. It's talking to you guys,
helping you guys become better men.
My community is growing,
and it's gonna be growing even more. I'm gonna plan on also having 52 new contacts this year. I also plan on having a better marriage
this year. What? You don't have a good marriage? I've got an okay marriage. I mean, we've been married for 28 years,
but it needs
attention.
It needs
the
love, kindness, and attention
that the relationship back when it first started had.
So, how are we going to do this? How am I planning on getting these
more men in my life,
you know, the 52 contacts, I'm gonna end up getting more
more clients.
How am I gonna do that? Well, it's gonna be take time. It's gonna take an effort. It's gonna take me getting out of my comfort zone of just getting to the truck stop and sitting
and twiddling my thumbs going, okay. Well, this is all fun and dandy and hunky dory.
No.
I've seen that my my
some of my marketing efforts are kinda working.
I would like for them to be higher. That's why I say kinda working because they are working, technically.
I go in there and I see the QR codes that I have put out on, at random places throughout the world that I travel to,
and I got QR codes,
mediums showing up
in my,
in my stats,
which is awesome.
Good.
Glad to hear that I am able to make that type of impression.
That people see it, they scan it, they check it out, and they okay. Cool.
And I see some flaws that are in there. 1, I don't know.
I think I could use is it, are they picking up the QR code off of my business card? Because there's some places that I put business cards up on on community boards.
Are people scanning it there?
What is it that these people need to learn to hear
to wanna become
clients? That's the big question. How do I get that? How do I find out what
they need
so that they are more willing to come
seek help?
And I get it. Us guys are not
known for going, hey. I I I need help.
But the guys who do are grateful for it.
So what do we need to do? Well, there's a couple things I plan on doing. 1,
and the biggest thing is I am going to become even more focused
in on what
Relaxed Mail is. How I get
to my goal of having
40 clients a a year
or 40 clients. Yeah. 40 clients in a year.
I want 40 clients that we go work a year for.
And
so that means that this year,
honestly, I wouldn't mind having having 60 clients.
Well, that's more than 40. How is that possible? Because it won't be for a full year.
Be 3 months a piece.
Little short 3 months stamps. And I'm still still we're still sitting at $600.
If you're interested in having a doing a
a a 3 month session, it's $600, man. Well, that would be a a steal
at for and getting yourself lined out and going in a great direction
for the 1st of the year.
How much money are you gonna spend on the gym that you use twice
when you actually have somebody like me who's chasing you down going, hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Come on. Let's get let's get this done. Let's you wanted to do this. Let's see what we can do on getting you this and getting this done.
So
I then also need to start looking and seeing what things I have not tried before. Like I said, I'm gonna have to get out. I'm gonna have to talk to people more,
but I'm also going to start trying
journaling.
I've done little piddly journaling from time to time just, you
know,
August 23rd,
blah blah blah.
Over here in
in Tyler, Texas
getting ready to unload blah blah blah.
Now
gonna start doing
daily
after action reviews
and journal
what I've done, what has worked, what has not worked, why it's not working,
what do I need to change
to make it work.
And so there's a few things you can do. If you wanna help, you can, do a vision board.
Allow yourself give yourself time to sit back. Think about what is it that you're wanting done
in your
in your life.
What does it look like?
What does it smell like? What does it feel like?
What is what would it be like when you succeed? And describe it.
Feel it.
Use your imagination.
Get it down to
a
very
pliable
thought
and then go pursue it.
What if you wanted a new car?
What car would it be? What's the color? What would it smell like on the inside?
Get all of that information down. Write it all down
and then keep reminding yourself of what it is and
keep
moving towards that goal.
What would it look like when I have 4,
when I have a full
full calendar,
for relaxed mail?
Now all that means is I've got 40, 40 clients,
and then I have 2 group,
men's groups that are meeting on Tuesdays Thursdays.
I'm making enough money that I can actually go ahead
and settle all my debts that I have right now
and be able to move down to Texas, down close to where my mom
lives. And so that I can be with her,
because she's getting on in age. She's starting to get a little bit older.
And
so to help be able to be there and to help her
and
and stuff like that, I have to be
closer. Right now, I'm about 6 hours away. Way too far if there's an emergency. That is way too much driving that I would wanna have to do to be able to get to some place that, you know,
where minutes count. So to be able to do that, I'm gonna have to I've I've
gotta be able to make that type of money. Get out of the truck
means that I match my
my income
and then double it.
Means that I would be able to get out because to be able to do taxes and all that other stuff, I know is gonna take up a good chunk of change.
Thanks, government,
for spending my money on stuff that I don't need to have spent.
But
but you have the opportunity and the ability
to do that. You can do a vision board. You can do journaling.
You can find a group of guys who are also wanting to do the same thing you are, and y'all meet on a regular basis. And when I say regular, I mean weekly.
And then when you come up with a game plan,
execute
that game plan.
Men
take action.
If you're just sitting around just talking about, oh, I think here pretty soon, I think I'm gonna go ahead and, I'm gonna try doing this.
No. Not here pretty soon. Tomorrow.
Do whatever this is.
Take
action.
You're never gonna get closer to your idea
and to your goal and to the life that you want
unless you stop piddle farting around
and start moving towards your goal. What is it that you want out of life?
When you can
name that and you can actually start doing that,
you're going to find that you're in a better spot
all around.
But to be able to do that, you have to start taking action. So that's a big thing. Take action. Actions are things like get a coach. Come see me. Go to relax mail.comforward/contact.
Fill out the form. Send it to me,
or you can go and hit,
you can go to relax mail dot com, and at the top, you're gonna see 1 on 1 coaching.
Hit that, hit that link.
Fill out the, the
the form
to to set up a
a a consult,
and we'll sit down and we'll talk it through. We'll see what is it that I can do to help you.
It's not
I'm not gonna do anything that scares you that's scary or horrible or terrible. I'm not gonna make you talk about your worst horrible experience in life
because your past is in your past. It doesn't matter to the future.
I'm one I'm looking to the future. I'm looking to the guys who want to have the relationships
that they want to that they want to have
this year.
The men who want a relationship have a wife
that loves them.
I want men who want to have
a relationship
that is the envy
of their neighbors.
Their neighbors look at them and go, god, how do we get that?
That's possible.
And it's not as hard as you think it is, though you do have to get out of your own damn way,
which is harder than us
to to do than you would think.
And if you're interested in doing that, you down at the bottom of the if you go to,
to the show notes for this, for this episode, which is 256,
You'll see down at the bottom, take the next step. Can you take the next step? Are you man enough to take the next step?
Because if you are, you're gonna start taking those actions and you're going to see
the results that you want.
And that's what I want for you.
But do you want that for you? So, guys, with that, I wanna say thank you very much for listening. If there's any questions or anything like that, you can shoot me an email at brian with a y at relax mail dot com. If this episode
resonated with you, if it rang a bell, it's it struck a nerve and that you think that you you can think of somebody who this episode would benefit,
then link it, share it out. All our podcast apps these days, even the modern podcast apps have a button that allows you to share
that podcast episode
out to Facebook,
X,
Mastodon,
any of the other places
that, that you have a,
you have a group, have a, a community. Good group. My brain's wanting to die on me. If you, you could take this and you can share it out as a as a text message
to that one guy that could really stand to hear
this, that there's an podcast out there that helps men become better men for their wives.
And that is how you help me out
because I wanna be able to help you.
And if the only way that sometimes that's gonna happen is by me getting help from you.
So, guys, with that, I wanna say thank you very much for listening. Y'all take care. Have a powerful weekend.
Have a powerful
following week, and we're gonna talk to you the following week. And keep coming back and coming back and coming back and talking to each other and raising the issues and helping you see
how much better life can actually be
because it's not as hard as everybody wants to think
wants to think that it is. It is actually a lot easier
to to
address and to, overcome.
The issue is is what do you actually think of that circumstance?
So, guys, till next week. Y'all take care. See y'all then.
Bye.